You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize