So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
