I'm gonna have a badass scar
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize