how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
