i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
