I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
