don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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