Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize