new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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