No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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