Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Randomize
