Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
two words...techno handjob
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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