My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize