I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
