He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize