I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize