Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
His nipple licking is glorious
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