This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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