she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are