I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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