The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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