How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Just pee around me
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
