ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
