Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
How external is "for external use only"?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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