Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
