will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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