google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize