Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
