She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Randomize
