Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
