I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize