i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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