I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Randomize
