well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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