I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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