IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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