Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
