I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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