we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
