i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
