drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
