Its about making memories worth repressing
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
