I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
