Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
