So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize