Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
