69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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