Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity