I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize