they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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