: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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